This is a question I have wrestled with for many years: what, exactly, constitutes "cool" in a person? There seem to be several different perspectives on what constitutes being "cool", depending upon the context in which the term is used. Two leap to mind at present.
Being "cool" can mean having the ability to stay or act correctly and calm in a given, often stressful situation. It can also mean acting "correctly" (usually in simply going along) in another situation, especially one in which some decpetion, illegality or improper behavior is involved or implied.
There are different definitions and opinions, it would seem, concerning "coolness". It’s weird; "cool", in this context, is a word like "skank" is a word. Or "white trash". No one really knows what it means, but we know it when we see it. "Cool" people, in my experience, are most often seen in very exclusionary cliques.
I high school, we all wanted to be in with the "cool kids". Why? Because they were cool, and popular, of course, how silly a question is that? I have never been "cool". Not once in my life. It’s just not me.
Jay Leno, interviewed on the 25th anniversary of Elvis Presley’s death, made the comment that The King possessed and "innate coolness" about himself. Celebrities are often referred to as "cool", even those who would not, physically, at least, seem to fit that bill. I once heard someone say that Woody Allen was "cool". Right. Okay……
Country singer Brad Paisley, according to his song "When you’re a Celebrity", makes the observation that "everyone thinks you’re cool, just because you’re on TV".
But then, celebrities today have publicists and handlers whose job it is to make them appear to be something they are not.
Tupac Shakur’s bodyguard (remind me never to hire him, by the way) wrote that his charge "spent most of his time trying to look cool and tough", when in reality he was not. His "cool" was, apparently, all image. Nothing more pathetic than a nerd in a blue bandana.
On the other hand, "being cool" is often the mark of possessing a level of charisma, something which celebrities (and the "cool kids" in school) very often are perceived to possess in surplus.
Coolness, to me, is having the innate ability to know almost exactly what to say or do in a given situation, and never really being riled by anyone or anything. To always be on top of the game. In short, good leaders are "cool". At least to me.
I hate people like this. I call them "annoyingly competent" because they never seem to screw up like I frequently do. They always seem to know exactly what they’re doing.
My boss, John, is "cool" by this definition.
He’s a huge, condescending, jackass (thusly, this makes him more of a "kewl" person, but more on that in a moment) but he always seems to be at least one step ahead and pretty much always knows what’s going on. He’s a good leader, and, because of this, is a good manager. He just, you know, could be less of a jerk, is all.
This trait is not a constant, however. I have known people who possessed a certain level of "cool" without being overtly competent. It’s all in the perception, I guess.
Now, on to "kewl" people….these, now, are often the people we knew in high school who we then thought of as "cool". Maybe they became "cool" after they matured, but back then they were "kewl".
"Kewl" people are the darker shade of "cool" people. They’re moderately competent as well, perhaps, but they always seem to have a smartass remark or condescending rebuke, or some degrading insult, readily at hand for any situation.
They also often seem to have to look tired or really, really bored. Why? Because they have to look "kewl", that’s why. Unruffled, unmoved. They’re "kewl".
They often wear black or darker colors, maybe motorcycle- or Heavy Metal-type clothing. Sometimes a lot of leather seems to be in their closet. This is, I suppose, to reflect their outlook on life.
Like their "cool" counterparts, they’re mainly cliquish, too, in my experience.
The factory where I work is teeming with "kewl" people. One woman in particular comes right to mind.
She slumps out of her car and saunters across the parking lot, cigarette dangling between her turned-down lips, eyes downcast (so she doesn’t have to make unwanted eye contact with anyone not of her choosing). Tell her "good morning", and you’ll be lucky to get a non-committal grunt.
She seems to have a problem with many men. She doesn’t like them a whole lot, see. Not that she’s a lesbian, mind you, no…..guys are good for picking up in a bar and a quick lay, but not much else, I guess. She relies on no one but herself. Men are pretty much useless.
I understand that, back in the day, she went in for the hardcases….you know, the "bad boys". The dangerous guys. And she got hurt. Time and time again.
So, based on many poor romance choices and generally bad relationship decisions on her own part, she has decided that men, in general, are all no good. Pigs. It’s really a shame, too, because she’s really very pretty, and could do very well for herself in that area, if she’d open up a little on her options. She has a beautiful smile, when she uses it, but, like many "kewl" people, when she smiles, it fails to reach her eyes.
She doesn’t say much to anyone who’s not a woman (unless it’s one of the kewl hardcase guys in the plant…she’s still into them, it seems, since she can relate), but screw up around her and you’ll get a sarcastic remark, scathing comment or putdown.
She’s the kind that, if she sees you screwing up, she’ll often quietly shake her head at your stupidity and let you screw up. Not so you can learn, but more so she can laugh at you, talk about you to others, and/or see you get in trouble for it.
In short, she’s "kewl".
The darker side of "cool".
"Cool" people are often nice people…"kewl" people are often not. I prefer "cool" to "kewl", but I’ll never have to worry about it because personally, I’ll never be either. It’s just not me.
I’m not sure why I wrote this…other than what is directly above, I really have no conclusion to insert here. What makes one cool? Kewl? Comments? Opinions?
Thanks for reading.